I was one of those kids that grew up with a rosy view of her country. In some ways you'd never know it--I never had a lemonade stand, my family didn't own guns, and I never liked country music. I didn't like apple pie until I was 25, much to the chagrin of my mother, who gave up on making any bread/fruit combination due to my pickiness.
Nonetheless, I easily considered myself a true-blue American. I voted as soon as I was old enough, I championed the ideas of democracy and due process, loved me some George Washington, and led the pledge to the flag in school.
When I was 18, however, I went off to college and began to look at the US under a microscope. I also made a bunch of international friends.
I saw for the first time the dysfunction of a capitalist system that had at its basis the idea that people should be left to their own faculties, and that the greater good somehow would be achieved through the pursuit of individualized self interest. The theology of capitalism profoundly confused me.
The US has just invaded (intervened in, whatever you want to call it) Iraq and I watched my friends in the international community view the US as an aggressive, realist, imperial power manipulating the public and its allies into war.
I got to know the makeup and evolution of the economic and political systems of the countries my friends were from (Zimbabwe, England, Grenada, Canada, Egypt, Ghana, Indonesia, and others) and got to see from a foreigner's perspective the consequences of a globalized world and the implications of collective action, inaction and strong arming.
I watched a volcano continue to erupt in the Near and Middle East and understood for the first time that the US had a huge part to play in the instability in the region.
I also began dating a guy who spent his entire upbringing in third-world countries, and I began to absorb his family's somewhat cynical anti-US sentiment.
For the first time, I did not see the US as a force of good in the world.
The last 8 years have been a quagmire of confusion and cynicism toward my motherland.
...This is not the post in which I'll be discussing my political viewpoints or an exhaustive assessment of the US' place in history and the world. That's for another day. Probably many other days. :)
This is something significant, though. It is a reflection of the fact that this was the first Independence Day celebration that I was able to wake up the morning of July 4th without shame.
I wouldn't call it pride. But I wouldn't call it resignation either. It's more like...quietly and confidently embracing my social and historical location. That God placed me here...now. That I'm called to be all things to all people...now. That every citizen is part of a group, culture, or nation that has components that we both applaud and shake our heads at.
Now, that being said...everyone sees the world through the paradigm of their own context. Concerning MY context, the pain of my divorce and the intense processing I went through colors everything I see....for better or worse. It doesn't own me or define me, but I carry those lessons, and they are part of my worldview now. Especially with what God has taught me about Himself and the world.
One way that these lessons have been applied to the idea of nationalism is that there is something deeply covenantal about a love for one's country. It's not like marriage, but it's one of the few examples of covenant we have left in this consumer-driven culture.
There is a commitment there...an understanding that there is brokenness, decay, and a story...but also that there is great potential. A willingness not to walk out or abandon things when the system breaks down...but to fight for it as agents of renewal in God's kingdom.
It's never been the point for me to be a gun-slinging, liberty-boasting, flag-waving American with the stars and stripes painted on my face (although I do love to dress up).
The point is to mirror Christ where He calls me.
This reality hit me as quite...beautiful. That my "rights" as an American or even a global citizen aren't the point...but that freedom in Christ is inalienable...whatever the cultural context.
So it was with a sober mind and grateful heart that I, for the first time in years, placed my hand over my heart during the national anthem...and thanked God for this life here. Now. In America.
Interesting to read this. It was interesting to also hear Isaac talk about how the US view nationalism as covenental... and I totally wouldn't. And I still can't pledge allegiance to the flag.
ReplyDeleteIt was super fun to spend this 4th a folksy church picnic. It was so cute, I loved it. And I do want to contribute to and encourage the country God has put me in. This (which I saw just before reading this post) still frustrates the life out of me, though!
http://www.facebook.com/TheFoundersBible
Saw this post
I don't think it's exclusive to the US by any means, or that we somehow have a corner on it here. I wouldn't say it's *actually* a covenant...it just functions more like one than a lot of other things in our culture. And also paradoxically not...I feel more "allegiance" to Calvin College than I do the US. :) I can't pledge allegiance to the flag, either. But should I condemn others who do?
ReplyDeleteMy hand over my heart during the anthem was more an acknowledgement of gratitude and having arrived at a place that I let go of my need to persistently be an outsider. In some ways we HAVE to be outsiders...as believers we're aliens here anyway, right?
I'm realizing that I don't know what the "right" way to be a citizen of heaven...while living in America...looks like. But I begrudged people who proudly and stridently took part in the political process and deeply idolized America...mostly just labeling them as blindly ignorant while not really being able to offer an alternative paradigm...other than to be an outsider who thoughtfully but condescendingly scrutinizes the process. I could suggest to myself and others how to *think* about being a citizen...but not how to act like one.
You can still participate as a responsible citizen and simultaneously roll your eyes at the culture. At least I hope you can. :) But I've spent too much time judging it and kind of counting myself superior because of my more "global perspective." I mean, look who I voted for. I voted, at the heart of it, for someone who would make the country as little like it has been as possible. Granted, it needed a push in a more globalized/accountable direction. But, like many things in my life, I wanted to see it change to become more like what I personally valued rather than what God may intend for it to be apart from my values.
It's kind of like how we who are in community groups are tempted to judge others in the church who aren't in community. There's a lot of benefit to community and to the Biblical perspective of pursuing Christ, but to condemn those who are pursuing community and Christ in a different but still Biblical way really just gives me haughty eyes. I realize that's a stretch. :) But you get the idea.
I do not think patriotism should be judged. It's just one form of loyalty, and the nation you're a part of isn't a bad thing to be loyalty.
ReplyDeleteThe problem comes in when patriotism and nationalism is linked inextricably with faith, but that's a whole different ball game.
My problem is more that the patriotism I encountered coming back made me feel like an outsider because I couldn't relate to the deep displays of emotional loyalty. So... I reacted against it and made sure to tell the world I wasn't a part of it.
But now I'm fairly comfortable with watching without begrudging, while also recognizing that I still feel like an outsider. I do care about this country though. If I didn't, I wouldn't bother voting.